“The pinky goo of Valentine’s Day draws near, as we are reminded relentlessly from various quarters. “Chef X has prepared a unique Valentine’s menu using naughty ingredient Y.” “New research reveals turnips are the vegetable of love, says Turnip Marketing Board.” Sainsbury’s launches heart-shaped cucumber. Nonsense, all of it, but it got me thinking about aphrodisiacs, those comestibles reputed to license roving hands and cause people to leap into bed together with gay (and straight) abandon.”